Monthly Archives: November 2013

5 things I’m (actually) thankful for this holiday season

Despite all my snark and cynicism during most of the year, I can actually have a serious side (I know, shocking). It usually comes out about this time of year, around the holidays, when I’m reminded how good I have it and how lucky I am to be living the life I live. So, in all seriousness (well, mostly), here are five things I’m thankful for this holiday season.

IMG_0609Family & friends. First and foremost. Basically anyone in my life who loves me unconditionally and would have my back no matter what. You know who you are. Without you guys, life would be a lonely place and probably not worth living. Just sayin’.

Freedom. The American government may have its head so far up its own ass that it’s lost sight of daylight but that doesn’t change the fact that I live in a (mostly) free country. I may complain about things I disagree with and liberties I don’t feel I actually possess but compared to what citizens of other countries deal with on a daily basis, I have it pretty great as an American. So, while I may hold a strong dislike towards our current president and the policies he may or may not have implemented, I’m glad I live in the good ol’ U.S. of A.

Hot food. Especially today, when no one wants to eat cold turkey, I’m very thankful that I have access to hot food (or food in general) on a daily basis. I know it’s probably not likely, but I hope everyone has a chance to enjoy at least one meal today.

IMG_0702Felix the cat. Some people may think it a bit silly to put a pet on your list of things you’re thankful for, but those are the type of people I wouldn’t be friends with anyway, so it doesn’t matter. Felix has become such a regular in my everyday life (well she should be, considering she lives with me) and I sometimes take her for granted. I know she won’t live forever (and some days I don’t want her to) but she and I have been through a lot together (see: cross-country road trip) and I love her.

Indoor plumbing. I know this is an odd one, but just think about it for a minute.

That’s all for now. Hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving and spent it with the people that matter. We only get one life, make it count!



Filed under Entertainment, Society, Uncategorized

5 things to give thanks for this Thanksgiving

There are so many things in this world to be thankful for this Thanksgiving that it can get a little overwhelming narrowing it down to just one or two. If you haven’t quite decided yet what you’re going to give thanks for this holiday season, here are a few extra special options to bring to your dinner table.

Netflix. Forget live TV. Say goodbye to endless ads and missing your favorite shows because of scheduling conflicts. Now, for one low monthly price, you can have access to just about any show or movie you want at the touch of a button. Besides, the other way is too old-fashioned. Obviously.

GPS. I’m not sure how anyone got from point A to point B before the invention of the GPS; I sure don’t know how I managed. Who remembers how to read a map, anyway?

Credit cards. Ah, plastic money. The solution to anyone’s financial problems. Clearly. Just swipe one of these bad boys and you can have anything you want. It’s just like magic.

Fast food. In this day and age, ain’t no body got time to wait around for a home-cooked meal anymore. Although some of these fast food restaurants can hardly call themselves “fast.” I mean, having to wait in my car for a minute and a half for my food?! Really, people. If you can’t get it to me in under a minute, I don’t want it.

Michael Kors. I don’t pretend to understand the current obsession is with MK lately (and by lately I mean over the past year or two), but it’s definitely prevalent in today’s society, and so seems worth noting when it comes to this list. I don’t get it, but whatevs. Majority rules, I guess.

There are many more, but these are just a few to get you started.


And if any of you actually give thanks for any of these things this year (or any year, for that matter), I will personally hunt you down, drag you kicking and screaming across the globe to a third-world country and publicly flog you while everyone looks on in sheer wonderment. Or something like that.

Oh yeah, Happy Thanksgiving!

Leave a comment

Filed under Entertainment, Humor, Satire